◕ ◡ ◕ (untranslatable)

Hello, loyal minions readers.  Are you doing great today?  If you aren't, that's your own fault.  Sorry, I'm listening to Mastodon.

BEAST MODE.

No, not that Mastodon!  THIS Mastodon...

I met these guys once.  Well... half of them, anyway.

The awesome metal band from Atlanta.  I'm sorry, let me amend that...  Mastodon, the greatest metal band on the planet, responsible for the aptly titled Leviathan.  The Mastodon that always produces epic album covers.  Let me refresh your memory (or enlighten you) as to what I'm talking about.  Have you ever seen the full artwork that the cover of Leviathan is taken from?

An epic of epic epicness.

Behold.  Avert your eyes if it is too much for you to handle.

So anyway, Andy informs me that they're gonna release a new album this year, which is always good news, cause if it's 80% as good as any of their other albums, it's already better than every other metal album out there, probably.  Except High On Fire maybe.  They're also pretty good.

Anyway, I'm getting aside from the point I was originally seeking to make.  I've gotten some new music since the last entry.  I hope you have too.  Mogwai released a new album?  Why is there a question mark there?  That's a fact, not an interrogative.  Mogwai released a new album.

No, not that mogwai.

"fuck you, PETA!"

There you go.  That's the right Mogwai.  Anyway, they released a new album.  I hate to say it, but it's exactly what you can expect from Mogwai at this point.  Ever since they started writing songs where they seem to forget to turn on their distortion pedals it's like they've lost their edge.  Don't get me wrong, it's still a good album, and if you like melodic post-rock, you'll love it.  I'm in love with the album title (Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will).  Is that or is that not a great album title?  Unfortunately, just like their last album, all the songs with the best names are the most forgettable tunes.  It just never matches up to their classics.  Young Team and Mr. Beast seem like ages ago.  At the very least, they're going to tour to promote it and come through Atlanta.  Maybe they'll play a lot of old songs?  Or maybe the album will grow on me.  I only gave it one listen so far.  Anyway, this is what it looks like.

Pitchfork gave it a 6.6.  That sounds about right.

Pick it up at a record store if it interests you.  Or steal it on the internet.  Your choice.

In much more noteworthy news about music coming out, Radiohead decided out of fucking nowhere to release another album.  What's up with that?  Most people hype the shit out of their albums for months before you can ever actually hear it or get your hands on it.  I think they're actually doing us a favor, to be honest.  It always seems to take for fucking ever for a new Radiohead album to come out when you're waiting on it and by the time it does, the anticipation has nearly destroyed you.  Your hands are shaking and you're biting at the plastic trying to tear it open as quick as you can and it just can't happen fast enough.  By casually letting it slip on a monday that the album is coming out the following saturday Thom Yorke is saving lives.  I figured they were close to releasing one, but had no idea it was already ready.  It's like boom.  Surprise!  This is what it looks like (even though you probably already know).

I'm digging it.

That one's also exactly what you expected it to be.  Amazing.  Enough said.  Go pre-order the fancy box that they're gonna sell it with and download the digital copy.  Do it.  Fucking do it already.

In even MORE music news (I should update this way more often so I don't overwhelm myself), the Flaming Lips do not have a new album.  I'm sorry if I got your hopes up there.  However, they are coming to Atlanta again in May.

a Flaming Lips concert is the most fun you can have without taking your clothes off or breaking the law.

I'm VERY FUCKING EXCITED to get to see them again.  Last time it was amazing and that was just a regular show.  This time, they'll be playing The Soft Bulletin in it's entirety!  I know that's kind of a kitschy thing for a band to do and as far as concert fads go, that's something that was getting done a lot more 2 years ago than it is now.  But you know what?  I don't give a shit, cause that's the kind of thing that haters who aren't gonna see the Flaming Lips say.  Boom.  I went there, bitches.  And if they are, in fact, coming anywhere near you, go.  I implore you to go.  Even if you don't really like them that much (what the fuck is wrong with you?) then you should still go.  Even if you hate fun (seriously, are you retarded?), then you should still go.  You will enjoy it.

So what else is happening?  Some guy emailed me and offered to trade me this...

win?

...for my amplifier.  Everyone seems to tell me it's a good deal.  And what can I say?  For the price I paid for the amp, it's definitely a return on my investment.  And can an amplifier save your live when the zombies come?  No.  Not unless you drop it on their head from above.  And let's face it, a solid 12 gauge shot to the head is much simpler and more effective.

poor suckers don't stand a chance

Speaking of zombies (which haven't happened yet), do you know what else is going on in the world?  I mean, that doesn't have anything to do with music?

Revolution.

a dude crowd-surfing in an epic mosh pit at the Egyptian protests

Okay, so in the right context, that does have a lot to do with music, but just not right now.  Even though as I typed that, I started hearing the Beatles song play in my head.  Well, as it turns out, Egypt says yes, they do want a revolution.  And so does Libya.  And Syria.  And, well, basically all of the Middle East and North Africa.  I mean, between all that and everything else going on, one has to think it's pretty biblically fucked up right now.  I mean, like... end times fucked up.  Like, I will not be surprised if it turns out that zombies happen soon.  But in the mean time, enjoy some freedom everybody.  And try not to get shot.